The Irrationality—LB Roland

Month

January 2011

20 posts

HPLovecraft in the opening lines of `The Call of Cthulhu'.

The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents. We live on a placid island of ignorance in the midst of black seas of infinity, and it was not meant that we should voyage far. The sciences, each straining in its own direction, have hitherto harmed us little; but some day the piecing together of dissociated knowledge will open up such terrifying vistas of reality, and of our frightful position therein, that we shall either go mad from the revelation or flee from the deadly light into the peace and safety of a new dark age.

This is for Alex.

Jan 31, 20112 notes
#HPL
Poem Written Whilst Under the Influence of a Tree

Beauty is truth,
But is truth enough?
I can’t accept these scholar bluffs.
I love the way her hair displays,                      
But I can’t help to think
that those locks will one day dissolve into rust.
So like this all things of beauty
Decay for all their sick display.
Wandering through this frozen maze of life
I see and feel so much beauty;
I am tempted to just continue that,
To seek that sort of joy all time.
And should all poems be to get me laid?
Shall I embrace the fact that all have felt
That sex is chief in all?
That a woman’s touch with a male response
Stands for all we want?
And so without shame we use our works
To bring these girls more closely?
Then my poetry is just a way to get laid
My clothes, my jokes, my way, my act, my friends, my stuff to help that.                      
It really bothers then that I can do that,
That I like all are brought to sex.
I’ve stared sex in the silky eyes,
And I’ve noticed something:
It is sad that I’ve not had it.
And so I realise somehow I’ve been saying these things,
Doing these things, albeit poorly, in vane.
I long to take a trip to all the good memories I’ve kept,
To attain this images I’ve seen in daily thought evoked,
To find a place unseen before.
I swear, I swear, the day I’ll die will be today.
Drink to me then.

Jan 30, 20111 note
#high #love #sex #angst #free verse #lbroland
Misplaced Quatrain

We’re writing are own stories
With each intended lie,
So each of us our hero
And heroes never die.

Jan 28, 20112 notes
#lborland #quatrain
Winged Victory

Winged Victory has no arms, no hands
With which to enjoy her only spoils,
Her body.

Jan 25, 20111 note
#war #poetry #lbroland
Jan 21, 2011614 notes
#John
Jan 20, 2011
#winter #lbroland #real life #prose
In an ongoing series on ratios....

Take the number of times you think of them
Over the number of times they think of you
This ratio is proportional to your loneliness;
I am alone.

Jan 18, 201117 notes
#lbroland #lonely #poetry #free verse #ratio
Poem written in the midst of math homework

Why is
it that we think that
two
people turning away from the world is
better than one?

Jan 18, 20111 note
#lbroland #poetry #free verse
(Untitled) written in my Housman phase

A Some-shire Lad is seated still
and fast upon his seat.
His favourite book upon the sill;
before him sits a treat,

a chocolate bar his mother could
afford for him the joy.
It melts and blends into the wood;
the wrapper is his toy.

The English pastures pass on by
the book on window sill,
but none of that will catch his eye
if he’s to still sit still.

His legs are slung over the seat,
and idly do they swing.
Loose boots just hung upon his feat;
he’s eating as he sings

a child’s song for God and Queen.
He’s finished with his bar.
His mother’s nowhere to be seen
in this or that train car.

Obeying watches pass the trees,
each stick and trunk and leaf.
So sets the sun over the leas,
but not his child belief.

A porter asks the boy to leave;
it is the final stop.
But not until his mother leads
him home, will he get up.

With time he’s put out to the cold;
no word to tell him why.
It seems though that he was so told
when mother said goodbye.

This town is not the town he knows
after he dares a look,
and then the silent tears to flow
for he’s without his book.

Jan 16, 201112 notes
#lbroland #metre #rhyme #housman
Unhappy (Untitled) written just now.

Take the number of people who love you
And divide from it how many things you have;
This ratio is proportional to your happiness.
I am an unhappy.

Jan 15, 20114 notes
#unhappy #poetry #lbroland #free verse
An Excerpt from "America" (written in my Ginsberg phase)

The words that had rode the wind for almost a century now went batshit 

Like a schizoid beatnik gallivanting and whoring about this country

Leaving dotted lines in every Franklin, every Salem, every Fairview, each Springfield, only a couple Washington’s

Suddenly poetry had wheels, suddenly poetry could be injected, suddenly poetry came in baggies

Suddenly poetry came in cum, suddenly poetry was in a box in your living room, suddenly poetry was in a magazine between your mattress

Suddenly poetry was found in your bum, suddenly poetry fell out of your hair when you scratched it, suddenly poetry was at the bottom of each cup of black coffee

Suddenly children were let to shout poetry, suddenly every living person on the earth had a notion in their head as to what poetry was and who it was for and that was them 

Suddenly the old fag and the new fag came together all at once in a cosmic union of philosophy and propriety in a supermarket, and every supermarket is super marked by their prescience and when you turn over a can of green beens and see that neon orange sticker that lovingly says 49¢ and you can see how it fits over the little ridges inscribed by some far off poet in a factory and how a nearer poet had stuck it there and accidentally torn a corner off so you slam the beens into the floor and see the blown up granny picture of vegetables injected with resin you realise

This is america, and the conversation is getting interesting

Jan 14, 20116 notes
#poetry #free verse #ginsberg
Jan 13, 2011
(Untitled) Sunday, November 15, 2009 11:10 PM

It seems no matter how much I write
This lovelorn desire I cannot quell.
I look to the night sky, blue from city lights,
And there a bough shows winter nudity.
It is a cool summer day, but the smell’s not there,
The smell of mown grass, of distant life.
I sit in an alley of bricks; I see the lattice of street lights.                 
The world is nothing. I’ve valued nothing these months;
I want only her, and she has found a new one.
I know that I’ll never be happy with these memories
Unless I can make them pale with new colour here.               
Here in the pomped walks of higher education
I must build the foundation for a love the world’s not seen,
Lest I grow old and join the clergy.

Jan 11, 20116 notes
#lbroland #free verse #lovelorn #poetry
Self Loathe (Untitled)

I am an idiot.
What else can one say
When one is just an idiot
In every single way?

I cannot bear to think
Of half the things I’ve done,
But I did them nonetheless,
And what is done is done.

This song, it means nothing.
It’s just to help self loathe
Which really needs no help;
It happens on its own.

-Thursday, November 26, 2009 8:50 PM

Jan 9, 20111 note
#poetry #lbroland
Something made me think of this. I don't remember what, but I remember it made me shiver.

Mid-term Break

I sat all morning in the college sick bay
Counting bells knelling classes to a close.
At ten o’clock our neighbours drove me home.

In the porch I met my father crying -
He had always taken funerals in his stride -
And Big Jim Evans saying it was a hard blow.

The baby cooed and laughed and rocked the pram
When I came in, and I was embarrassed
By old men standing up to shake my hand

And tell me they were ‘sorry for my trouble’
Whispers informed strangers that I was the eldest,
Away at school, as my mother held my hand

In hers and coughed out angry tearless sighs.
At ten o’clock the ambulance arrived
With the corpse, stanched and bandaged by the nurses.

Next morning I went up into the room. Snowdrops
And candles soothed the bedside I saw him
For the first time in six weeks. Paler now,

Wearing a poppy bruise on his left temple.
He lay in a four foot box, as in his cot.
No gaudy scars, the bumper knocked him clear.

A four foot box, a foot for every year.

Jan 5, 2011
#Seamus Heaney #poetry
Interesting (Untitled and Unedited)

I think we are a genuinely interesting people
I fear though the mundanity of each other frightens us
But we should embrace rather.
The interesting man knows how uninteresting he is
He is aware of his insignificance
These are the men who sit every night in the same bar
And have been the centre of attention every night for years
They see a stranger walk in and they make no presumptions
They only introduce themselves as the king
of this irrelevant whole in the wall, carved out years ago
They like it there
And you too should like it where you are
Look around you, it is interesting, but not in itself
Your or our surroundings will only interest your or ourselves
Think of the conversations you had today, how many mattered?
I imagine only a few had ramifications to your life
And out of those every so often it matters to the world
But it does not mean these words mean nothing
The idle conversation had between strangers is meaningful
The empty play of two lovers is meaningful
My poetry is meaningful, you may think that yours is not
Many people may feel their poetry is alone and worthless, but
Putting a poem in a book does not affect its meaning, you know this
For with logic the meaning resides in the words
If you’ve written poetry it is most certainly meaningful
But it is true it does not matter to the world, but still
You are interesting for it
Accept these things about life, that it is trivial, and
Enjoy how trivial it can be
Imagine the freedom you’ve had before
I can remember being at a theme park,
We were waiting for a ride, and she was there
The conversation was about us, and that was the day it happened
But that day was full of empty words, and nonsense jokes
JOKES! jokes are the most important part of your life
Laughter will follow you into the solemn despair of adulthood
It will deliver you to higher realms
We think the human spirit to fly to such great heights, but really
Sitcoms and video games is the extent I see us going
You are often pretentious, stop that
I do not desire the world to devolve to the lowest common denominator
but I would like to see a mobility between the strata
I’d like frozen entrees and beef wellington
This all pleases me though,
Because we are indeed an interesting people
And in an indifferent universe, what else could matter?

Jan 4, 2011
#poetry #lbroland #free verse
“La Infinita
Ves estas manos? Han medido
la tierra, han separado
los minerales y los cereales,
han hecho la paz y la guerra,
han derribado las distancias
de todos los mares y ríos,
y sin embargo
cuanto te recorren
a ti, pequeña,
grano de trigo, alondra,
no alcanzan a abarcarte,
se cansan alcanzando
las palomas gemelas
que reposan o vuelan en tu pecho,
recorren las distancias de tus piernas,
se enrollan en la luz de tu cintura.
Para mí eres tesoro más cargado
de inmensidad que el mar y su racimos
y eres blanca y azul y extensa como
la tierra en la vendimia.
En ese territorio,
de tus pies a tu frente,
andando, andando, andando,
me pasaré la vida.”
—

(via asi-te-querran)

Me encanta.

Jan 4, 20111 note
#poetry #Neruda #español
Who do you think of when you write about women? Are you thinking of Woman, or the girl you loved, or others?

Some poems are for all women, some have been for girls that I know, many are for the girl I once loved, and a few have been for girls that I have passed on the street never to see again. I am sure there is one for you in there somewhere.

Jan 2, 2011
Child Roland to the dark tower came His word was still: "Fie, fo, and fum I smell the blood of an English man."

LBRoland is no child; he is a troll. 

Jan 1, 2011
Subtextual Beauty (Untitled)

I am not certain of the difference
Between what she has said
And what she has meant.
I know perfectly well what I have heard,
And I know perfectly the possibilities.
Either she says that which was said
From her nature, which is that which I have loved.
Then she would just be the crucible
For cruel fate and my tragedy.
Or! she speaks from unknown knowledge
And each word she has spoke is but one jab
Accumulating to the thousand injuries I have born.
No. No.. No… No….
I am glad to have loved such a subtextual beauty
For there is said to be more joy in reading
When the ink runs deeper than the page.

Jan 1, 2011
#poetry #free verse #love #lbroland
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